The Art of Doing Nothing.
I'm not actually doing nothing. I'm doing a lot. But I am working on trying to not feel guilty for not doing exactly what I should be doing all the time. I'm working a lot. I'm surfing as much as possible. I'm sleeping a lot. I'm doing fun social activities with my awesome boyfriend and friends a lot. What I am NOT doing is using my free time to get more work for myself. I'm haven't shot anything lately. But it's ok. I'm not unhappy. I don't feel like a loser. I feel pretty satisfied and only a little complacent at the moment. I have to admit that surfing really fuels a feeling of satisfaction in me, similar to the way photography does. If I am surfing a lot, I feel proactive. I think that's a farce though, because my future does not depend on my motivation to get myself out in the water, and in many ways, surfing has been taking up time I should be using for my own personal work.
Still waiting on a paycheck so I can get my Holga shots developed. I'm interested in seeing if I can still shoot in the loose and unpredictable way that camera requires. I'm not sure it's really about inspiration at the moment, though I'll admit I am lacking a lot right now and still struggling with the inertia beast. Last weeks (and tonight's) 7pm-7am graveyard shift through me for a loop. I'm not sure I'd do it again but it was definitely worth the experience. A photography shoot during the witching hours is not as exciting as it seems at first. The pain that creeps up and sets in behind the eyeballs is the first of discomforts. What follows is the nausea from feeling like your body is fighting itself to stay awake and alert. And finally, the average aches and pains in your feet, shins and lower back after 12 hours of standing and lifting. Oh how it sucks. I imagine that if I were the one behind the camera and not the one lifting lights and scrims and flags, then maybe the hours would have flown by faster. One day.
Just got a message from Lae, my rapper friend saying he's interested in setting up a time to shoot. I'm looking forward to that a lot. Won't be this week, unfortunately, but maybe next week before Big Sur. I have a full weeks worth of work. Beginning with one last graveyard shift tonight. Please. Let me get through it without a breakdown.
I love this shot of my wonderful friend Jeannie. I know, I know, her hair's a mess, and it's not exactly a "beauty shot"...but she looks absolutely natural and gorgeous to me here, with such an intensity behind those dark eyes. I snapped this post surf session and I wonder if the expression I love is really just dirty look she is giving me for taking her photo at such an undesirable moment. You tell me. Oh, and say the word Jeannie, and I'll pull this off of here. =)
Still waiting on a paycheck so I can get my Holga shots developed. I'm interested in seeing if I can still shoot in the loose and unpredictable way that camera requires. I'm not sure it's really about inspiration at the moment, though I'll admit I am lacking a lot right now and still struggling with the inertia beast. Last weeks (and tonight's) 7pm-7am graveyard shift through me for a loop. I'm not sure I'd do it again but it was definitely worth the experience. A photography shoot during the witching hours is not as exciting as it seems at first. The pain that creeps up and sets in behind the eyeballs is the first of discomforts. What follows is the nausea from feeling like your body is fighting itself to stay awake and alert. And finally, the average aches and pains in your feet, shins and lower back after 12 hours of standing and lifting. Oh how it sucks. I imagine that if I were the one behind the camera and not the one lifting lights and scrims and flags, then maybe the hours would have flown by faster. One day.
Just got a message from Lae, my rapper friend saying he's interested in setting up a time to shoot. I'm looking forward to that a lot. Won't be this week, unfortunately, but maybe next week before Big Sur. I have a full weeks worth of work. Beginning with one last graveyard shift tonight. Please. Let me get through it without a breakdown.
I love this shot of my wonderful friend Jeannie. I know, I know, her hair's a mess, and it's not exactly a "beauty shot"...but she looks absolutely natural and gorgeous to me here, with such an intensity behind those dark eyes. I snapped this post surf session and I wonder if the expression I love is really just dirty look she is giving me for taking her photo at such an undesirable moment. You tell me. Oh, and say the word Jeannie, and I'll pull this off of here. =)
